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  1. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    It has been a long time, but I figured I would come back and see what's up on this thread. Lots of good additions!!! :thumbsup:
  2. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    The madam opened the brothel door in Salt Lake City and saw a rather dignified, well-dressed, good-looking man in his late forties or early fifties. "May I help you sir?," she asked. The man replied, "I want to see Valerie." "Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you...
  3. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    That was a long one, and I didn't see that ending coming!
  4. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    A blonde walks into a library, goes to the librarian, and says "I would like to order a cheese burger, onion rings, and a large orange drink." The librarian says "I am sorry, don't you know that this is a library?" So the blond whispers "Oh, then I would like to order a cheese burger, onion...
  5. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    Male Logic Woman: Do you drink beer? Man:Yes Woman: How many beers a day? Man: Usually about 3 Woman: How much do you pay per beer? Man: $5.00 which includes a tip (This is where it gets scary!) Woman: And how long have you been drinking? Man: About 20 years, I suppose Woman: So a...
  6. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    My new favorite bar!!!
  7. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    Senior Sex The husband leans over and asks his wife, "Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you." Yes, she says, "I remember it well." OK, he says, "How about...
  8. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    I really hate getting duped...
  9. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    Yeah, I lost the motion in my previous mouse trap post, too. It is a GIF file, but when they upload to the forum, they convert to JPG which is a still photo. As for the toilet paper joke, Yes, I am sorry I did not lick it off the paper, that would have been awesome. But seriously,it looked...
  10. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    True story. I did this this afternoon... So, my brother in law was making beer today, and at the bottom of the pot he was boiling all the ingredients in, there was this nasty brown sludge, consisting of various oats and hops, etc. So, he was washing the pot out and I said "hold on..." and...
  11. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    Oh, I bet it would work! Works like what we call a "Squirrel-a-whirl" down here in Texas. Picture a three legged wheel hub on a tree, with a dried corn cob at the end of each leg. The squirrels don't give up,and as they get out to the ends, the thing spins around and throws them off. Oh, such...
  12. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    Redneck mousetrap... nevermind, picture wouldn't work. it was supposed to be a gif that moved.
  13. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    A lawyer and a blonde woman are sitting next to each other on a long flight from Los Angeles to New York. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde is tired and just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a...
  14. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    A little something to offend everyone! I'd just come out of the shop with a roast beef sandwich, large chips, ear of corn & a jumbo sausage. A poor homeless man sat there and said 'I've not eaten for two days.' I told him, 'I wish I had your will power.' A fat girl served me in McDonald's at...
  15. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    Not a joke, but very amusing picture... Bud Light semi on fire underneath signs for Coors Light and Miller! :cheers:
  16. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    A teenage boy had just passed his driving test and inquired of his father as to when they could discuss his use of the car. His father said he'd make a deal with his son, "You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, and get your hair cut. Then we'll talk about...
  17. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    Sorry I haven't contributed in a while... “The Woman Marine Pilot” The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and, one by one, began to tell their stories. There were all the...
  18. scooper77515

    Scooper's Jokes!!! Enjoy! Add your own!

    OK, not really a joke, but pretty funny, and in no way meant to be racist. Just a play on words...
  19. scooper77515

    96 XP with good engine, good mpem, bad coil, for sale. $500 in Yuma, AZ.

    Someone go pick it up, please. Dad blew up the coil, and doesn't know how to work on it. We are selling it from Yuma, and it will need to be picked up there. Pictures and descriptions throughout my threads, and check out my photos. PM me if you are interested and I can get directions...
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